The Hilarious Tale
by biancajewel
Summary: This is my first story of Naruto! So please, no critics! I've tried to make it hilarious and romantic (Appleiam required) Please R&R!
1. chapter 1

The Hilarious Tale

By: Biancajewel.

This story is dedicated to Appleiam, for she gave me information about Naruto so I could write a story.

Chapter 1

One day, a boy with spiky yellow hair is walking lazily down the street, his head resting on his hands and outstretched arms casually. He is humming a stupid tone, and doesn't pay attention to the passer bys that look and stare at him as if he is a baka and a rotten cabbage. Then, he disappears down the curve. Suddenly, a big hole appears and he falls down, and he yells out. Too late. He is gone.

After a few weeks of investigation, the investigators presume that he is dead. Poor Naruto.

**The End**

………..

Haha! Fooled you! It's not the real story! THIS is the real story. I like tricking people sometimes:

One day, a boy with spiky yellow hair is walking lazily down the street, his head resting on his hands and outstretched arms casually. He is humming a stupid tone, and doesn't pay attention to the passer bys that look and stare at him as if he is a-

Naruto: Cut it out ALREADY! People want to hear the REAL, and I mean REAL story.

Narrator: Sorry, can't help it, I like tricking people sometimes. This is the real story:

One day, a boy with spiky yellow-

Sakura: Shut up and start with the real story, because I'm getting impatient!

Tenten: Yeah, Narrator, cut it out! Bleck, Chouji, you're spraying crumbs all over the place!

Chouji (mouth full): Sorry. (Grin).

Narrator (rolling eyes): You know, I hate narrating, why don't you just get somebody-

Naruto: You'd better start or else I'll-

Sakura: Wow, Naruto, you've never talked so much bef-

Narrator: Alright, I'll start, I'll START! Sorry, readers, but anyways, here's the REAL REAL story:

Scene: Naruto humming stupidly.

"Shut up, Naruto, it's pathetic," a girl with pink hair strolls over, and slapped him. He yelped and ran away.

A girl with yellow hair tied up in a ponytail walks over. "Hey, Sakura." She said.

"Hello," replied Sakura sarcastically.

"Do you like Sasuke?" inquired Ino.

"What a dumb question, Ino!" exclaimed Sakura. Ino's head suddenly hangs down.

"Er… Ino?" asked Sakura.

(Meanwhile, Ino is reading Sakura's thoughts, and she smiles evilly. "We're going to have some fun here…heh.")

"What?" Ino is back in her body.

"Nothing. You're head was down so I thought something happened to you."

"Nope."

Back in the house…

"Do you want to be a dog?" a boy with spiky hair menaced.

"No," another with black hair replied, continuing to stuff cookies in his mouth.

"I can if you stop eating the cookies she baked, Chouji," threatened Kiba. Chouji stopped stuffing cookies into his mouth.

"W-what?"

"I told you to stop."

"Fine." Chouji stands up, and walked out of the door.

In another room…

Tenten is threading out the hole in her pants. She groaned, and sank into the bed she was sitting on. "I'm so pathetic," she murmured into the pillow.

"What are you doing?" Gai walked in the room.

Tenten quickly sat up. "Um, nothing," she muttered.

"Oh," he blinked. "Oh." His teeth sparkled.

"Stop showing your teeth," mumbled Tenten.

"I can, and I AM your teacher so what can you do? Control me or something?" he laughed which showed even more of his teeth.

"Kakashi doesn't," Tenten grinned at her joke.

"Argh!" Gai bounded up, and stormed out of the room.

"Finally," muttered Tenten.

Tenten heard the door open again. "Argh, if it's you, Gai, I'm going to kill you." It wasn't. It was Neji.

"Oh, um, hi," mumbled Tenten.

"Was that Gai?" asked Neji.

"Yeah."

"Oh."

"I-I guess I'd better be going," Tenten muttered, and she pushed past him and bumped into (surprise, surprise) Naruto.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

"What are YOU doing here?" he asked.

"Stop copying me," she snapped.

"Stop copying ME!" exclaimed Naruto. They smirked at each other, and walked away.

Suddenly, a dog (quite fat) ran yipping up to her.

"Uh… who are you? When did…" she gasped and yelled, "NARUTO! I'm going to KEEEL you!"

Naruto came running, grinning like a maniac, closely followed by Kiba, who was smirking.

"Did you let this dog in?" she demanded rudely. Naruto made a face.

"Nope."

"Why are YOU smirking, Kiba?" demanded Tenten. Hinata poked her head out.

"A DOG?" she exclaimed quietly.

"Uh, yeah, duh," said Tenten sarcastically.

"Kiba, did you do this? And… is that Chouji?"

"Uh…yeah," Kiba said uncomfortably.

"So it's YOU!" shouted Tenten. She walked up to him and punched him and he flew away. Another dog appeared. Tenten screamed. "AAHHHHH! WHAT THE HELL IS THIS OTHER DOG DOING HERE? AND, HOW MANY DOGS ARE IN THE HOUSE? DON'T TELL ME! ONE HUNDRED! KIBAAAAAAAA! I'M GOING TO KEEELLLLL YOU!"

**That's it for now! I hope you enjoyed the first chapter! I don't really know Naruto.**


	2. chapter 2

The Hilarious Tale

By: Biancajewel.

This story is dedicated to Appleiam, for she gave me information about Naruto so I could write a story.

Chapter 2

(Tenten is in her room, thinking of a plan.)

"Hmm… maybe I should poison the dogs? Or maybe, I should poison Kiba? Or Naruto? No… that's not good…oh!" her eyes lit up and she grinned evilly.

(Let's look back where Ino and Sakura are, shall we?)

Naruto strolled up to them, not spotting them. He is humming so he doesn't see.

"Er…" said Sakura.

"Er…" said Ino.

"Do you know that you're bald?" asked Ino to Naruto. His eyes flew open.

"WWWHHHHAAAATTTTTT?"

Sakura and Ino snickered. "Just kidding, just kidding," Ino muttered.

(We must pause for a quick conversation between Biancajewel, Appleiam, and Jelly.)

Biancajewel: How do you think of this prank Ino played?

Appleiam: Good. But is Naruto really bald?

Jelly cheers.

Biancajewel: No, he's not bald.

Jelly: I hate Naruto! (Marches up to Naruto, and punches him. He flies off into the distance. Sparkle!)

Biancajewel and Appleiam: sweatdrop

Well, back to the story!

At night…

Tenten is tiptoeing around the house. She crept into Kiba's room. "Thank Heavens he's sleeping," she thought. She grimaced as the floor creaked below her. Kiba stirred, but didn't wake up. She darts over to the cage where the two dogs are sleeping. Quietly, she puts a muzzle on each of them so they won't bark. She swiftly takes the cage and tiptoes out of Kiba's room. "Whew!" she thought.

She goes down her own secret place, carefully places the cages inside, goes out, and slams the door shut!

The next day…

"Tenten, have you seen my dogs?" asked Kiba, looking frantically at Tenten.

"No, I haven't." Tenten puts on an innocent face.

"Well, if you see either of them, tell me, ok?" He runs out of the room, and bumps into Sasuke.

"Er, Sasuke, have you seen my dogs?" he asked.

"I've never even seen them before," Sasuke snapped.

"Oh, well, one's really fat and the other is really cute, so if you see either of them, tell me, ok? Thanks."

Meanwhile…

Naruto is yelling is head off. Ino and Sakura are snickering.

"Why the heck are you yelling, Naruto?" Neji appears.

"A-am I bald?" asked Naruto. Neji starts laughing.

"Of course NOT, Naruto! What's up with you?" he rolled on the grass, tears falling down his cheeks.

Naruto, angry, storms off and bumps into Sasuke.

"Am I bald?" he asked again. Sasuke shook his head. "What kind of question is that?" he muttered to himself, and he walked away.

"Oh. Er, hi, Sasuke," said Sakura. Ino continues snickering.

"Hi and why are you snickering?"

"Uh… some joke," replied Ino, giggling.

A few weeks later, Tenten discovers that the dogs are dead. Triumph! She goes and tells Kiba. He's furious.

"How can you?" he screamed.

"Why can't I? I told you not to let those stupid dogs in the house!" Tenten yelled back.

"One of them is Chouji," shouted Kiba.

"So who do I care? He's always stealing my food!" Tenten screamed.

"I will never forgive you!" Kiba screamed at the top of his lungs.

"So, you're not the most important person to me, so I DON'T care!" Tenten bellowed.

They continue arguing. Hinata, Naruto, Sasuke, Neji, Gai, Ino, and Sakura come up to them and stare at the commotion.

"Whoa, what's going on?" asked Naruto.

"I'll never forgive you!" Kiba yelled into his face.

"Uh… I didn't do anything wrong, did I?" asked a puzzled Naruto.

"WHO CARES IF YOU DON'T FORGIVE ME?" Tenten screamed.

"You are such a BAD PERSON, TENTEN! YOU ARE THE UGLIEST PERSON I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE! YOU LOOK LIKE A BOY!" Kiba shouted back.

Tenten's face turned dark. She stepped forward, cautiously, and stared at Kiba in the eyes. Kiba glared back.

"What-did-you-say?" asked Tenten in a calm voice.

"YOU LOOK LIKE A BOY!" screamed Kiba. Tenten took another step forward to him.

"Can you repeat that again?"

"ARE YOU DEAF?" yelled Kiba. "ARE YOU? HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO REPEAT?"

Tenten was so close to him their noses were almost touching. She grabbed him up by the collar. "Do-not-say-that-I-look-like-a-boy, understand?" she asked in a threatening voice. Everyone tenses up.

"BOY!BOY!" screamed Kiba.

Tenten raised him even higher. "I'm warning you…"

"BOY!" shouted Kiba. Tenten dropped him, and pinned him to the ground. Ino, Sakura, and Hinata gasped. Tenten raised a fist, ready to punch. She's choking him already.

"Argh!" gasped Kiba, gasping for breath. (I don't know Naruto, so this might be VERY different than you expected.)

Tenten's fist in coming down in a very quick speed. Kiba's eyes widen.

"No!" Neji yelled, and he hurtled himself at Tenten, grabbing her arm from punching him, and he grabbed the other that was choking Kiba.

"Let-me-go!" shouted Tenten, and she struggled against Neji's grasp.

Biancajewel: What do you think?

Appleiam:…..

Biancajewel: Okay, I don't really know Naruto. Anyone, please REVIEW, OKAY? THANKS!


	3. chapter 4

The Hilarious Tale

By: Biancajewel.

This story is dedicated to Appleiam, for she gave me information about Naruto so I could write a story.

Chapter 1 (REALLY)

Author's note: Sorry everyone, but I looked at the pictures of Naruto and they look soooooo different than I expected. So, I'm starting allll over again. (I mean it.) Is anyone other than Appleiam going to give me reviews? Start with the REAL REAL story now! Hope you …er… enjoy it!

Well, everyone's in teams, and they're all cool…they're all cool… Sakura sill has a crush(no duh) on Sasuke, and Naruto still has that demon fox spirit in him, and Hinata still has a crush on Naruto and… well… you get the picture.

Naruto nearly pulled all of his hair off.

"Argh!" he yelled. "When is this stupid ramen going to be ready? Ooooohhhh." He took a deep breath and checked his watch. "Urgh, still TWO more minutes! AAAHHH!" Well, if you are a good picturer, than you can picture in your head Naruto jumping on the spot and staring furiously at the cup of ramen on the table. He's so impatient. Siigggghhh.

Sasuke strolled into the room, and stared at Naruto. "Are you crazy?" he asked him. Naruto doesn't notice. He's too busy staring at his ramen. "FINALLY!" he yelled. Sasuke rolled his eyes. Typical cold and no sense of humor guy. Not what I like. Anyway…

Naruto is wolfing down his ramen, sending the noodles flying everywhere. Sasuke frowns when a noodle hits his face.

"Naruto…" he growled.

"What… erm… wait a minute… I'm almost done…" Naruto finished his ramen, wiped his mouth, and looked up, grinning.

"Can you explain what the heck this noodle is doing on my face?" he points slowly at his face where the noodle is still dripping down.

"Well, you see, Sasuke, I was really impatient so noodles flew everywhere." He grinned apologetically.

Meanwhile…

Sakura is looking at herself in the mirror. She frowned when Ino appeared, arms crossed, looking at her.

"Can you please go out?" she asked coldly.

"Make me," Ino sneered.

Sakura sighed. "You know," she began, "Sometimes you are really annoying and I need my own privacy. Now please get out before I smack you in the face."

Ino smirked. "_Can_ you?" she asked. "Can you _slap _my face? Do you _dare_?"

Sakura spun around. "I DO!" she shouted. "And I CAN!"

So Ino and Sakura start yelling at each other.

Meanwhile…

Choji is stuffing junk food in his mouth. Shikamaru eyed him in disgust. "Choji, you're spraying crumbs all over the place."

Choji smiled and continued munching on the food. Kiba marched in with Akamaru on his head.

"Still eating, Choji?" Kiba laughed.

Hinata poked her head in the room.

"C-Choji's still e-eating?" she asked.

"Yup, fat as ever," replied Kiba. Choji eyed him but kept silent.

Meanwhile…

Naruto is still trying to explain to Sasuke why he threw the noodle in his face until Sakura and Ino marched in, glowering at each other.

"Uh, well, you see, I was really hungry so I threw noodles all over the place when I was eating." Sasuke, arms folded, glared at him coldly.

"Well," he said quickly, "What do you expect me to answer? I've given you all the reasons."

Sasuke continued glaring at him.

"Oh, er, hi, Sakura and…Ino," said Naruto, turning to the two girls, who were glaring at each other.

"Hi, Naruto." Glare.

"Yeah, hi, Naruto." Glare.

"Hi, Sasuke." Glare.

"Yeah, hi…" Glare.

"Um, I should go now… I'm disturbing your…um… conversation. Bye!" he slinked away. Sasuke sighed.

"Huh?" Glare.

"You're too stupid to realize," Ino sneered. Glare.

"ARRGGHH!" Glare.

Sasuke sighed even louder. He walked past the two girls, and walked out of the room.

He bumped into Neji.

"Hi."

"Hi."

"It's so boring these days, isn't it?"

"Yeah, kind of."

"Why do Ino and Sakura hate each other so much?"

"I don't know. They just do. Have you seen Tenten?"

"Uh…no, I haven't yet."

"Oh."

Silence.

Naruto comes up. "Hi, Neji," he said brightly. Then he spotted Sasuke. "Er… I've got to go sorry. Um…" he trotted away, looking back over his shoulder.

(Quick conversation)

Appleiam: Is this story always boring?

Biancajewel: I can't think of anything yet, so, right now, it is kind of boring.

Appleiam: Oh.

Jelly appeared. Jelly: Hey guys!

Appleiam: We're girls.

Jelly: Hey girls!

Biancajewel: Erm… hey.

Appleiam: Do you like my story?

Biancajewel: Yeah, I like it. You have more reviews from different people than I do. Why isn't anyone other than YOU reviewing? (She's angry)

Appleiam: Dun no.

Biancajewel: I'm sooo pissed off. Let's end the chapter right here, then. (Slouches off.)

Bye, everyone, and PLEASE REVIEW!


End file.
